Nicknames

Hey guys,

Remember when I said I would post a page with the nicknames of some of the guys? Well, wait no longer. I finally decided to sit my ass down and write this, even though I have a mile high pile of homework waiting for me on my desk.



The Pittsburgh Penguins:

Evgeni Malkin: Geno, Rusky
Sergei Gonchar: Gonch
Maxime Talbot: Superstar
Jordan Staal: Staalsy, The Gronk
Kris Letang: Tangers
Matt Cooke: Cookie
Ruslan Fedetenko: Feds
Marc-Andre Fleury: Flower, Rebounds
Sidney Crosby: Sid the Kid, Bing, Sid Vicious
Tyler Kennedy: TK
Michael Rupp: Ruppy
Pascal Dupuis: Dupper

The Ottawa Senators:

Jason Spezza: Spezz, Giggles
Daniel Alfredsson: Alfie
Jonathan Cheechoo: The Cheechoo Train, Cheech
Mike Fisher: Fishy
Chris Kelly: Kells
Alex Kovalev: AK27
Anton Volchenkov: Volch, Volchy
Brian Elliott: Ernie
Jesse Winchester: The Lane Finder


The Washington Capitals:

Alex Ovechkin: Ovie, The Great Eight, Alex the Great, The Mechanic, The Russian Machine
Alexander Semin: Sasha
John Irskine: Irsky
Mike Green: Game Over
Jose Theodore: Theo
Semyon Varlamov: Semy, Varly
Ollie Kolzig: Zilla


The Chicago Blackhawks:

Jonathan Toews: Captain Serious, Tazer
Patrick Kane: Kaner, 20 Cents
Patrick Sharp: Sharpie, The Uterus Killer
Brian Campbell: Soupy, Chicken Soup


Others:

Dany Heatley: Heater, The Heat
Ryan Malone: Bugsy
Vincent Levalier: Vinny
Henrik Zetterberg: Ice Berg, Zata, Hank, Z
Steve Mason: The Wall
Martin Brodeur: Satan's Wallpaper
Don Cherry: Grapes
Tie Domi: The Albanian Assassin
Patrick Elias: St. Patrick
Jean-Sebastien Giguere: Jiggy
Dominik Hasek: The Dominator
Saku Koivu: Captain K
Nikolai Khabibulin: The Bulin Wall
Mikka Kiprusoff: Kipper
Eric Lindros: The Big E
Roberto Luongo: Bobby-Lu
Chris Osgood: The Wizard of Oz, Ozzie
Teemu Selanne: The Finnish Flash
Mats Sundin: Sudden
Tim Thomas: The Tank
Francis Bouillon: The Cube, Frank the Tank
Steve Yzerman: Stevie Wonder, Stevie-Y, The Captain


The Classics:

Jean Beliveau: Le Gros Bil
Yvan Cournoyer: The Roadrunner
Wayne Gretzky: The Great One, The Great Gretzky
Gordie Howe: Mr. Hockey
Bobby Hull: The Golden Jet
Brett Hull: The Golden Brett
Guy Lafleur: The Flower
Mario Lemieux: The Magnificent One, Super Mario
Mark Messier: Moose, The Messiah
Maurice Richard: The Rocket
Henri Richard: The Pocket Rocket
Larry Robinson: Big Bird
Luc Robitaille: Lucky Luc
Patrick Roy: Casseau, Saint Patrick



Brought to you in part by Loonie Engraved.

Disapointment.

Remember how in the last post I said Thursday was gonna be the best day ever? Well, turns out I was wrong. Turns out, Thurdays was the worst day ever. Let me walk you through it.



Pittsburgh was in Ottawa. I was driving to school in the morning when I recieved a text from my good friend Gabby who lives in Kanata. Now, here's some little inside info: The Brookstreet Hotel? The hotel to be at. The hockey teams stay there when they play in Ottawa. You know how many famous people have probably worked out in that gym? Gahhhh.



Anyways, Gabby drives by the Brookstreet hotel every single morning to go to school. And guess what she tells me in her text? That she is currently 100 meters away from Sidney Crosby. Working out. They were working out. In the gym. The Pittsburgh Penguins. She got to see them, and all I've got is a lousy text message and a feeling of insane jealousy in my belly.



And then came the news. I find out in a few hours that I have a hockey game later that night. Which, lo and behold, means I will miss both the Pittsburgh game, and Grey's Anatomy! The day was beginning to diminish, and all this happened before lunch. Lunch, just in case you were wondering, was crap as well. If you're even a tiny bit late in getting your food, then all the tables are filled and you have to sit by yourself. High school sucks.



So, as the day goes on, I decide to take a brighter outlook on life. Yeah, I'm missing the Pitt game, but hey, there are always highlights. And I can watch Grey's Anatomy on ctv.ca tomorrow. And I get to play our club's rivalry team who we tied last game, so we get a chance to redeem ourselves. The day was looking up already. Or so I thought.



I was planning on studying for my huge science test that night before my hockey game, but I got a shitload of homework and didn't even have time to start. Oh well, is what I though, because I don't even give a crap about science anyways. So I decided to focus all my attention on the game I had to play. I was feeling good; I had eaten pasta. I felt like I was going to play a great game.



Boy, was I wrong. We lost. 6-1. But not only that. I was a -4. A -4! Do you people have any idea how bad that is? My shift on the ice, they score a goal. 1-0. My second shift, their second goal. 2-0. I think to myself that I really gotta step up my play on I'm not gonna play the second period. So, I go on for my third shift, all pumped, and I play kinda good. I keep the puck out of the zone for the majority of the time, and all is going fine. Well, until the very end of my shift, when I mess up a pass and give them a breakaway. 3-0. This is when my coach finally decides to sit me, a bit to my relief. I'm benched for two shifts, and I'm thinking that this is the time the redeem myself, maybe make something happen. I'm more positive as I go back on the ice, but not for long. They score again. 4-0, and all on my watch. We finally manage to put one in the third period, but, knowing my luck, I wasnt't even on for our only goal.

So, to sum up: I did not get to see the Pens game, I did not get to see Grey's Anatomy, I played like shit in my hockey game, we lost our spot in first place, and, if that wasn't enough, the Pens lost! Against Ottawa! How bad do you have to be to lose against the Sens? Jesus.

ZOMG

Guys, big big big news!

First of all, Grey's Anatomy tomorrow night! Yay! I cannot get over my obsession for that show.

Second, and more importantly, the Pens are in town! They're playing Ottawa tomorrow night, and that means that they flew in today. Can you imagine? Geno is probably begging Gonch to drive him to Fratellis at this exact moment so he can load up on the best Spaghetti in town before the game tomorrow. Jordan Staal is probably planning a sneeky date with one of the Ottawian puckbunnies that he has on speed dial in case of emergency. Because it's true, all hockey players do cheat. Even if they're in love. Kris is probably beginning his pre-game day ritual by combing his gorgeous Sex Hair exactly 100 times. Soon he will remember that he can no longer do that, because he chopped it all off and there is nothing left. But I'm not bitter. Sid is probably sitting cross-legged on the floor of his hotel room repetedly chanting his always faithful maintra: "I am The Next One. Mario will always have my back. I will not cry at the game tomorrow. Colby still thinks of me as much as I think of him. I will show absolutely no emotion in any of my interviews. Ovechkin is a loser. I will not cry at the game tomorrow." And Max...well, Max is probably crying over the fact that he still can't play and filling the empty hole where hockey usually is by banging every chick in town.

On a happier note, tomorrow is also Patrick Kane's birthday! Happy 21st, Pat! Underdog Obsessed will buy you a beer for me, since I will be kind of busy that night watching Pittsburgh kick Ottawa's loser asses.

Oh, and one more thing. Siddo hoisted the Olympic Flame today. Well, he ran, while hoisting it. It was pretty epical. We were all really excited for him. All the videos were pretty crappy, so I didn't wanna disgrace the dignity of this blog by putting them up here, but you're welcome to go on youtube and search for them yourself. I'd turn your volume on low; the sirens are crazy loud.

Thursday is gonna be a big day.

Jason Spezza Goals

Sorry I haven't posted in a while; there have been some things going on.

Jason scored his very first goal of the season a few days back, it was a pretty nice one too. Top corner, less than a minute left in over-time. Good timing, Jay. Also, good timing on your second goal tonight. The shootout winner, stuffed in just beside the pad, off the post, off the goalie's butt and in. Not too pretty, but still a goal.

I think Clouston should stop letting Alfie take the shootouts. Every year Alfie takes them. I can't remember the last time he scored a shootout goal. It makes me sad when I see him skating up after Kovalev scores his goals. That's what Kovalev is handy for. He always scores in shootouts. Spezz usually comes third. He's about 50/50. I think Ryan Shannon should shoot. He's really, really good. He can skate down the length of the ice in about three strides.

I kind of have mixed feelings about when Spezz has a good game. Of course, I want him to play well, I love him, so, naturally, that's how I feel. But I can't help but think that whenever he has a good game, he's gonna get laid. Stupid Jen Snell, messing with my mind. She's probably shagging him right now. See what this is doing to me? Sometimes I wish he would just dump her already. Wait, did I say sometimes? ALWAYS.

Irony

Remember my post from a while ago called Injured Reserve? I talked about all of my favorite players who all of a sudden have simultaneously become injured. I raved on and on, and at the end, I said that if this keeps up, soon Ovie and Sid will get hurt. Well, guess what? Ovechkin is hurt now. Yeah, I know. I jinked it. I'm sorry. Not that any of you like him at all. No one around here seems to like Ovie. I don't understand this. He is one of the greatest hockey players of all time. Yeah, maybe he's a bit cocky, and maybe his goal celebrations are a bit over-the-top, but he's good! Just look at the goddamn stats! And you can't blame him for loving the game, that's just the only way he knows how to show it. I don't know about you, but I could use a little more enthusiasm from our hockey players nowadays. I'm not saying it's getting boring, but they could at least spice things up a bit. The fist pump is getting a little old.

Rememberance

Haha, remember Mike Commodore? Wow it's been a while.