Montreal Misses You, Kovalev

I went to the Ottawa-Philedelphia game today...what a game.

First goal is scored by Philly right off the bat, and we're all like 'oh shit'. But then, all outta no where, Kovalev scores two goals. So does Chris Kelly, making it 4-1 Sens after the first. So, my sister and I at the game are all cheering for a shootout, right, because we were right up at the front and we wanted to someone to pull an Ovechkin and hurl their bodies at the glace after a goal. But once the Sens go up by three goals, we think all hope is lost, right?

Wrong.

Second period, Flyers throw in three extra goals, tying it up at 4. Life is good again for the people who don't give a shit about the Sens and just wanna see some good tough hockey. Because when the score is tight, that's when it's gonna get rough.

Third period. Everything's intense. Everyone's on the edge of their seats and...guess who? Alex Kovalev, throwing in another puck for his second hat-trick of the season. Unfortunately, we did not have any hats on our person, but my sister did get a special red Ottawa hat tossed her way, which she gracefully lauched on the ice. Chris Kelly tosses another one in, putting the Sens up 6-4, burrying our shoot-out dreams in the ground and buying us all a free slice of pizza. And, you know, funnily and ironically enough, they used to call the Alfredsson-Spezza-Heatley line the Pizza line, because they used to contribute a lot to all the goals that the Sens used to score, you know, before their game went to hell, and not a single member of that line was present in that game. Alfie and Spezz are injured, and Heater, as you know, is off making history with his new friends in the hot hot sun.

So, the game starts getting a little bit better. Time is running out, and there's only one thing left for Philly to do: smash Ottawa's face into the boards. Which is exactly what they tried to do, not much to any avail. There were no fights today. I have never been so dissapointed with Neil and Carkner in my entire life. Neil did not get one pernalty the entire game. Not one. And my seats were right next to the box. I was looking forward to saying hello to him.

Anyhow, Kovalev decides to put another goal in, just for fun. You know, it seems that whenever he scores, he always has to make a huge deal of it and put in two or three more just to make it seem more special. Have you ever noticed that? He has 11 goals this season, and two hat-tricks. Today he had four goals and like three million assists. AK27 was on fire.

Both starting goalies for each respective team were pulled close to the beginning of the game. Pascal Leclaire looked extremely blue sitting there on the bench. His hair was hanging over his face in beautiful brown strands. It was a sight to behold, I can tell you.

Final score: Ottawa-7, Philedelphia-4. What an upset. Chris Pronger may be a beast, but today he played like crap. He is a disgrace to the dynasty that is the 2010 Canadian Olympic Team. Why he even made it is beyond me. And Richards wasn't anything special either. I'm beginning to wonder about Stevie Yzerman's current sanity. And Kovalev should've made the Russian team. No question.

For the Love of God

I just found out that Jesse Winchester, of the Ottawa Senators if you didn't know which you really should, has a really cool nickname. They call him "The Lane Finder". How awesome is that? He isn't even fully on the team, he keeps switching back from Binghamton to Ottawa and back again. That must be tough. It sucks that they make the farm teams so far away from the actual NHL team. Someone should look into that. If not for me, for our good friend Jesse. He isn't even really a part of the team and they still give him a nickname. How great is that? That really shows how loving and caring and giving and recieving and open-minded and greatful and manly and humble and nice the Ottawa Senators are. Hell, they kicked Buffalo's ass the other night without two of their best players! That, ladies and gentlemen, shows depth. The Sens have a depth like you have never seen. If they're missing a big goalscorer, like when Dany Douchebag Heatley ditched during the summer and completely screwed over two NHL franchises, they have people step up to take the plate. Like Mike Fisher. He is having the greatest season of his life, not to mention his new fiance with the million dollar engagement ring. And when the Sens are missing a big hitter, like when Chris Neil was out for a while and we thought all hope was lost, BAM! Matt Carkner. There are even debates now that Matt Carkner could even beat Chris Neil in a cage fight. That's huge! So, when Ottawa lost Jason Spezza, they didn't cry! Well, most of them didn't. You know, I'm not counting myself in all of this. But anyway, they weren't upset because they knew that their team had the depth to make up for their loss and come out on top in any situation. They were on top of the world, they could conquer anything! Well, that was all until that faithful (fateful?) night about a week ago when they got their asses handed to them on a silver plater by the defending Stanley Cup champions. They lost their captain, they lost their dignity, and, worst of all, they lost their hope. There was no hope for their next game that they had to play against the Buffalo Sabres. They didn't have Alfredsson, a fearless leader and an amazing play-maker with a killer shot, and they didn't have Spezza, someone who hasn't really been on his game the past two seasons (something I have and will always to continue to blame on his wife) but a stand-up guy all the same. The poor little Senators didn't know what to do! They were lost and confused; they knew they needed to depend on someone, but who? Not Kovalev...sure, he's a great hockey player; he has amazing hands and a snipe that could rip right through Brian Miller's glove, but he's not dependable. Hell, they needed someone consistent, someone who they could count on to do what was best in the time when it matterd most. Someone, someone like Fisher. Yes, he would be their captain, he would be their leader. He would be the one to lead them into the abiss. Or would he? Would he continue to do what he's been doing all season long? Would he make the passes, take the hits, and rack up the points? Or would he crash and burn? We've seen it happen many-a-time before; you're only hope in the world fail on you in your time of need. Maybe it's all the preasure. You know, it's really hard to funtion when a whole city of caffeine-crazed hockey fans is depending on you. Maybe that's Kovalev's problem. Well, we'll never know for sure, but I have a theory about him. When we're all excited, we're thinking, "Good, we've got Alexei Kovalev, he'll replace Dany Heatley no problem, he'll solve all our problems." That's when things will go wrong! That's when he'll crash and burn! See? When we give up on him completely, when we say, "Jesus Christ, we've made the biggest mistake of our lives, bringing this turd on the team. He can't do shit for anybody!" That's when he'll shine! Don't you guys get it yet? That's why he's so inconsistent! Wow, I'm just one kid and I figured that out. You'd think the greatest hockey minds in the world would be able to figure it out too. I mean, if the game against Buffalo wasn't enough proof for you, I don't know what else to give. Kovalev was amazing that game. He kicked ass. In the "stud" and "dud" report in the newspaper yesterday, he was the stud! Kovalev is a great hockey player, and don't you ever forget it!



Wow, what the hell was I talking about here?