Not A Good Way To Start

Okay, the Ottawa Senators have played three games so far. Three games, three loses. It's not looking good for the team that just got rid of the circus caused by our favorite little sniper. We all gave a sigh of relief on the day Heatley got traded, and looked forward to bigger and better things. We all thought we were better off without him, but, obviously, we have some things to think about. The Sens lost two games to Florida. FLORIDA! Need I say more? And today the lost their third game to the Habs. I guess I can give them that. Montreal kicks ass. Although, it was looking pretty good for Ottawa up until the end of the second, when Maxwell tied it up at one. That goal was scored on a powerplay, courtesy of Jason Spezza. Two goals in the pre-season so far have been scored when he was in the penalty box. I blame his marriage. It's tearing him apart. I say, end it soon Spezz, before your game becomes the shits. You know, I've realized lately that no matter what I talk about, I almost always end up coming back to Jason Spezza's marriage. JENNIFER SNELL. Bleh. She irks me. If I were at the wedding, I would have stepped on her dress. I mean, did you see that thing? It looked like a freaking pelican threw up on her. Honey, there's a line between festive, and over-use of feathers. You passed that line. No, you know what, you were so far past the line, you couldn't even see the line. The line was a dot to you. I got that from FRIENDS. Greatest show of all time. And I'm not just saying that because Sidney Crosby's obsessed with it. I discovered it before he did. He copied me, not the other way around. I am wayyyyyyy more obsessed with it than he is. I can quote almost all the lines. Ask my friends. It annoys the living hell out of them. Have you noticed that I tend to ramble when I have nothing to talk about? That annoys them too. I think I know what Dane Cook means when he says there's always that on person that nobody seems to like...I think that person is me. I love Dane Cook. He makes my life. Listen to this. Twice. And then again, just to be safe. Laughing gives you abs, and trust me, you'll have an eight-pack after this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hl9VxVmXAxs

And this one too. This one's also good.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eJvxYKoCkYQ&feature=related

Okay, this is the last one. It's better than that last one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=98vZuid_744&feature=PlayList&p=6EB22455F1ADA122&index=13